orange sun

second sketch

mermaid

1st phase sketch inspired by beluga whales and the following daydream:

i want to be a mermaid in seafoam green i want my hair to bleach until it’s nearly translucent. i want my eyelashes so light and thick that if i close my eyes your depth perception gets mucked. i want to feel good slipping into the cold and murky tirade of our moon’s patterns, i want to wash my heart, sun myself on slick rocks. i want to be half mermaid and half oranges-eating changeling. if i am a changeling then my energy and efforts and the lack of requital makes sense. then also i will have some invisible armor, woven from myth and vague playful memories. i can choose to be hard with justification because i am something that must be protected, something that must be respected, must be loved unconditionally, madly, like a poison. i am dangerous. i will be a sick siren, a scream so high-pitched that it will relentlessly vibrate against your insides, i will slowly chew and then spew venom that eats at your thickest fibers, i will be the ever-promise of eternal magic that you let go, whose spirit you destroyed almost completely (you will secretly know i have recovered ten-fold and now blossom in the freedom of my half-existence). i will be the thing you almost caught, almost tamed, almost forgot, and then lost.

i will move to my own fairytale cottage and i will get a sewing machine and hole myself up away from all the vampires. i will have a garden of herbs, fennel and basil and cilantro, lavender, and lime and orange and lemon trees,
i want to be a chlorine swimming pool mermaid, i want to be invisible under the dead leaves. i will cover my body with a mud mask and lie in my backyard and then play in the sprinkler to wash it all off.

OUTFITS

i'm going to start posting pictures of outfits i put together.
garage soul dance night outfit: pale pink tights, orange skirt with gold chain, red/white patterned 70s tank top, and silver glitter disco platforms

concert attire for 2/26 RTX show at the Echoplex!! incl. over-sized velvet platforms.

this one's my daily wear for 1/13/11:
i spend a lot of creative energy creating outfits from what i do own, and conceptualizing outfits that i'm not sure exist.. at the end of this month i'm going to buy a sewing machine and start actualizing some of these ideas. tried and true rocker clothing coming soon!

VIDEO

me dancing with Farflung in September.
audio is messed up, so turn your sound down (but not off)!


video by Shazzula

ghosts of the old plains

progress on the sketch for serena's tattoo i'm finally getting on my ass to do (because i get off my ass to do everything and anything else). her phone call pushed me to get started and lack of friends and excess of loneliness pushed me to continue. I hope to finish this by the end of the week.


the visual idea is a fantastical archaic buffalo, a new mythological buffalo creature with scales and feathers.
it's helpful to see my sketch on the screen because it objectively shows me where there are problems. when i revisit this sketch i will skew the scales in a way that suggests the form of his body, move the right eye down a bit because his head is slightly tilted, and even out the horn size. everything else is going to evolve naturally.

in a (probably superficial) sense it's coincidentally appropriate that i'm beginning to reread Bury My Heart At Wounded Knee. maybe vicariously some vein of depth of connection with this land i cannot wholly rightfully claim, yet still feel, will grace this creation process.

west coast strut that was as sweet as molasses

cheeseball dream i had soon after the car accident in August. going to fill out just a little bit more, then do my special process of
1. scanning
2. printing out on watercolour paper (but this time i'm going to blow up the size
3. painting
4. pen and ink




believe it or not this one's close in on my heart/psyche